[I]t's just another witless trip to the slaughterhouse.

| Original Score: C | Apr 12, 2007

| Original Score: C | Jan 20, 2007

Glen Morgan's update of Bob Clark's 1974 slasher flick Black Christmas is an exemplar of how to screw up a modern horror film remake.

| Original Score: 1/4 | Jan 5, 2007

It's old-school stupid.

| Original Score: D | Jan 3, 2007

Black Christmas lacks the timing and visual wit to make its splattery EC Comics gags either genuinely scary or funny.

Full Review | Jan 3, 2007

Like the fruitcake sitting on your counter it's a rather rote waste of time, and for the life of me I can't come up with anything else to say.

| Original Score: 1.5/4 | Jan 2, 2007

As yuletide counterprogramming goes, here's one smelly lump of coal.

Full Review | Jan 2, 2007

One for real horror-buffs only.

| Original Score: 2/5 | Jan 2, 2007

The result's an undemanding multiplex filler -- a ho-ho-horror movie that knows it's the season to be jolly.

| Original Score: 3/5 | Dec 30, 2006

A modern horror movie featuring a non-ironic shower scene is far less knowing than it pretends to be.

| Dec 30, 2006

A surprisingly memorable creepfest that fleshes out the characters' backstories while adding a heaping helping of blacker-than-pitch humor to the proceedings.

| Original Score: 2.5/5 | Dec 29, 2006

Creativity is a stranger to this sick excuse for entertainment, which pounds a ridiculous back story into a butchered rehash that includes incest, cannibalism, eyeball gouging and impossibly dumb plot contrivances.

| Original Score: 1/4 | Dec 29, 2006

It also exchanges the police subplot that gave the earlier film its steady pace for a lot of pointless backstory about the mother-fixated stalker.

| Dec 29, 2006

If you were thinking of seeing the remake over your holiday break, consider the original Black Christmas, directed by Clark, instead. It was recently released on DVD and is considerably less irritating.

| Dec 29, 2006

This movie serves up a bland, interchangeable mix of victims. Because the sitting ducks don't display any personality, it's hard to get worked up about their fate.

Full Review | Original Score: 1/5 | Dec 28, 2006

Even by the notoriously low standards of sadistic slasher pics, this remake is a thoroughly nasty piece of work, relying heavily on such gruesome spectacles as the baking (and consuming) of Christmas cookies made from chunks of human flesh.

Full Review | Dec 28, 2006

Connoisseurs of trashy moviemaking are left with a bland slasher film, filled with a bad guy who lacks menace, a script that lacks humor and several hot young characters who have the nerve to go throughout the picture without taking their clothes off.

| Original Score: 1/4 | Dec 28, 2006

Glen Morgan's disastrous remake smothers terror beneath a blanket of unnecessary information, revealing too much and teasing too little.

Full Review | Original Score: 0.5/5 | Dec 27, 2006

Where the first film was a seminal forerunner of early stalker classics like Halloween, this version feels as stale as old gingerbread.

Full Review | Original Score: 1.5/4 | Dec 27, 2006

Silly, obvious, clumsy, and just gruesome enough to keep jaded genre fans from angrily throwing popcorn at the screen.

| Original Score: 1.5/4 | Dec 27, 2006