Vampires Suck sucks.

| Original Score: 1.0/4.0 | Sep 26, 2020

Mocking the vampire vogue like a child pulling pigtails (hard), this is playground humour, and the school is definitely gross-out.

| Original Score: 1/5 | Aug 24, 2018

It's been two whole years since the team of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer subjected us to one of its godawful parodies. Alas, the vacation is over.

| Original Score: 1/5 | Jul 25, 2014

With the level of humor here running to flatulence jokes, groin kicks and high-school smart-aleck cracks, their movie does, indeed, (surely no other critic in the world will be this clever) SUCK!

| Original Score: 0.5/4 | Jul 25, 2014

A witless, slavish pastiche of the series of romantic dramas based on Stephenie Meyer's Twilight novels. It is a knowing film that knows nothing about comedy.

| Jul 25, 2014

Vampires Suck, and films like it, not only fail to parody elements of contemporary society, they barely spoof the genre they are trying to mock.

| Original Score: 1/10 | Jul 25, 2014

For the most part, the jokes are mildly relevant at least

| Original Score: 3/5 | Jan 6, 2014

I know comedy is subjective, so grant me that Vampires Suck just did not make me laugh. It probably doesn't help that, as a spoof on the Twilight franchise, it's making fun of movies I also don't enjoy.

| Original Score: 0.5/5 | Jun 3, 2013

It's almost as cynical as the actual Twilight, and not nearly as funny.

| Jun 3, 2013

It is as monotonous and predictable as rain in November.

| Jun 3, 2013

All but the most die-hard fans can agree that the Twilight movies are spoof-worthy. So it's too bad they don't get a worthy spoof.

| Original Score: 2/5 | Jun 3, 2013

An insult to other bad vampire movies, which is saying a mouthful.

| Original Score: C- | Feb 4, 2013

There are few things worse than watching a comedy flatline for over an hour, tossing its "funny parts" into a vacuum of uncomfortable silence.

| Feb 9, 2012

A banal mess that sacrifices anything resembling satire for a series of smutty jokes.

| Original Score: 0/5 | Aug 30, 2011

Only Friedberg and Seltzer could film this dross with the belief they are making even a half-decent comedy.

| Original Score: 2/10 | Feb 18, 2011

Casting two lookalikes and coaching your young actors to mimic the trio from 'Twilight' isn't enough to make for a great parody.

| Original Score: 5/10 | Dec 14, 2010

There was a time when, for a certain generation, the release of a new Naked Gun or Hot Shots movie would be cause for real excitement.

| Original Score: 2/10 | Oct 30, 2010

A movie that will have you pining to watch the real Twilight films. Yes, it's that bad.

| Original Score: 1.5/5 | Oct 19, 2010

A witless, puerile spoof of the Twilight movies.

| Original Score: 1/5 | Oct 18, 2010

Vampires Suck misses its targets in spectacular fashion thanks to the directors' usual approach of simply recreating scenes from the original movies without any real understanding of what to satirise or even how to go about it.

| Original Score: 1/5 | Oct 18, 2010